Daily Prompt: Year

via Year“>Daily Prompt: Year

It’s over. And, it’s begun. 2016 wasn’t rough. It was downright hard. I broke up with people, added a few more to my life. Went to a Shrink. Got a Certificate for a career. Asked for my space. Took on myself as my own responsibility. Started a business. It was amazing.  I’ve been liberated. And I encourage anyone who feels lost to actively begin taking care of themselves. Seems a bit oxymoron-ish, but I found myself doing that, and I keep doing that.

I still sleep in and eat junk food and somehow say I’m still a kid all the while people treat me like an adult and ask for my opinion and want to spend time with me.

I’ve learned though, that I really should have written that book about depression. I really should have shared my heart about why it hurt when I was overlooked for that lead role. I should have just come right out and said I was never listening to their advice so I didn’t have to sit through what they thought was a helpful conversation. All because, everyone mentioned that they were going through the same exact thing. Facebook status’ said that 2016 was rough for a lot of people because of those exact things I was going through, and oh how I wish I had known them and they had known me.

I also learned that it’s alright to NOT know who Leonard Cohen was and it’s alright that I don’t know the words to very popular songs or that I don’t have very good dance moves. The more I pretend that I do know who famous people are, or try to sing a song I don’t know, or try to dance like the cool kids do, the more I look the fool. And I’d rather just look like me. And me, doesn’t know all those things. And that’s alright, because I still have friends anyway, despite that.

Another thing I learned is that my “shyness” of not wanting to say hello to someone in a crowd is really me just not wanting to be vulnerable. And vulnerability is important. As is, being the better man, by stepping up and saying hello, even if the person you’re approaching should be approachable but instead has the capability of shaming you.

2016 was a year of great memories too. I had someone by my side who gave me a reason to live. She has no idea the impact she has on my life and how grateful I am for her friendship. Now that she’s far away, I realize that 2017 needs to be a year where I learn how to live on my own and still find hope in every day.

So here’s to 2017 with the hope that none of us are alone this year. We’ve got each other. And no matter how much I write, It’s alright that I say And.


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